Linda’s story of loss and survival after losing all three of her children.
Over a period of two and a half years, my friend, Linda Noort, lost all three of her children. The following is her own words describing the mental and emotional journey she has been on since the death of her son, which was followed by her two daughters.
One afternoon as I was walking on my journey with the Lord, I noticed, in the distance, the remnants of an abandoned well. As we drew near and looked in, I thought, how utterly frightening it would be to fall in! I whispered a prayer to Jesus for my children, who always seemed to tread too closely to the edges of such places.
Then, without warning, the enemy came from behind and pushed me into the empty cistern! When I landed at the bottom, the Lord was already there. He picked me up in His arms and held me until I could breathe again. I felt safe with Jesus and, though I could not climb because of a broken heart and spirit, I knew He would never leave or forsake me. (Joshua 1:5)
As my strength returned to me, I began my ascent towards the light of the sun. With the Saviors help, I scaled each small ledge, inching my way to the top. When I finally reached the opening, I paused for just a moment to let my eyes adjust to the bright light of day. Much to my horror, the evil one was waiting there, preventing my escape. He promptly kicked me off the edge and I began to fall. I landed on a small ledge and huddled close to the wall. I was confused and bleeding from my head and heart.
When I could stand, I began to touch the jagged rock wall before me, hoping to find a small crevice, anything to help with another attempt out of what had become a familiar place. Suddenly, I heard a rumble and everything around me shook violently! The ledge that I stood on broke from under me and I was free falling, for what seemed like eternity. The empty well seemed deeper than before.
When I finally landed, I laid in a disoriented heap, I did not, could not move. All was dark and silent. I whispered a desperate cry to the Savior, but the silence was so silent, I could not hear an answer. The darkness was so dark that I could not see the Savior there.!
As I lay in despair, my mind wrested with itself until the words came. “I thought we were almost out Lord. We were so close. Why did You let this happen? Where are You, Lord? I can’t see, hear, or feel You!”
Then I heard it! It was faint but becoming louder. Yes! It was familiar. As I listened, I realized it was the same sweet song I had heard the first time, at the bottom of the well. Soon it was echoing, bouncing off the rock walls in beautiful harmony. As I closed my eyes and listened, I was lulled to sleep by the lullaby.
When I opened my eyes, I could see something! Yes! There it is! A tiny spark of light. Then another, and another. Soon it seemed as though a thousand tiny lightning bugs were coming towards me. The singing became louder and sweeter! Soon the tiny lights were all around. I gasped as I turned my head! There, right beside me was my beautiful Savior! I could hear His gentle voice reassuring me that He had never left me, and indeed would NEVER leave me. Tears ran down my dirt-streaked face, and I knew that I was safe.
And so, I will sit here with Jesus until He tells me that I am ready to climb again. And as I wait, I am comforted by the familiar melody, which is the prayers of my “Jesus” sisters, and the lights that show me my Father’s face, which are the many kindnesses and blessings, sent from those above to remind me that they know I am down here, and that they will be waiting with open arms, when the Lord brings me safely to daylight once more.
Linda Noort — December 2020
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